We're happy to host David Lamb's ON TOP OF THE WORLD (UNTIL THE BELL CHIMES) virtual book tour today! Please leave a comment or question for David to let him know you stopped by!
Title: ON TOP OF THE WORLD (UNTIL THE BELL CHIMES)
Author: David Lamb
Publisher: Woolly Mammoth Books
Pages: 240
Genre: Contemporary Fiction/Contemporary Romance/Multicultural/Humor/Satire
Author: David Lamb
Publisher: Woolly Mammoth Books
Pages: 240
Genre: Contemporary Fiction/Contemporary Romance/Multicultural/Humor/Satire
2016 BEST
FICTION-Pacific Book Awards. FROM
THE FUNNY AND NATURALLY BRILLIANT DAVID LAMB, award-winning playwright of
the New York Times celebrated play, Platanos Y Collard Greens, comes
a modern spin on Dickens' classic tale that perfectly combines humor and
romance in a story re-imagined for our digital, consumerist age. This
version of Scrooge and Belle is familiar, yet unlike any you've come across
before. Scrooge, or rather Scrooje, is music's biggest superstar, with one
hundred million albums sold, fifteen million devoted YouTube subscribers, two
and a half million Facebook likes, and twenty-five million fanatical Twitter
followers known as Scroojites. Belle, is a legal shark who gulps down her
opposition voraciously and whose beauty and stunning figure causes traffic
accidents as she zips through the sidewalks of Manhattan stylishly adorned and taking no
prisoners. They never imagined being music's most powerful couple, but
that's exactly what happened when Belle fell head over heels and gave the
Coke-bottle glasses wearing, plaid and stripe attired, scrawny, biggest nerd on
her college campus the ultimate makeover, turning him into a fashion impresario
whose style sets trends from Milan to NY Fashion Week and who can be seen
courtside at the NBA Finals sporting a perfectly-fitted cashmere suit.
Then it happens. Belle realizes too late that she's created a chart-topping
monster as Scrooje's ego explodes and he starts acting a fool. Now, it's
been three years since they ve spoken. But tonight at Hollywood s biggest red carpet event, with the
whole world watching, they'll be given a second chance. Will Scrooje
listen to the ghostly-advice of Marley, his best friend since the fourth grade,
who at the time of his untimely drowning at his Brazilian poolside birthday
bash was as big a star as Scrooje? Will Scrooje finally do right by his number
one artist, Cratchit, a genius comedian, who Scrooje invariably rip offs every
chance he gets? And with twenty-five million viewers tuned in will
Scrooje finally shed his ego, jeopardize his image and declare his love for
Belle, the one he betrayed and let slip away? Second chances don't often
come around. Will Belle even give him a chance? Mixing heart, soul,
bling and romance in a fresh, original satire about race, class and celebrity
worship Lamb establishes himself as one of the most talented and amazing
writers today. And leaves no doubt that the Pacific Book Awards chose wisely
when they selected On Top Of The World as the year's Best Fiction.
Purchase Information:
Amazon | iTunes | B&N
The devil doesn’t wear Prada, he wears Sean John and
I was the idiot who taught him how to shop.
That was what I got for reading Frankenstein
in college. I’d been turned into a mad scientist without even realizing it. Just my luck,
I was a math major and the one literature course I took had tricked me into
creating a monster.
When I first met Scrooʝe, he—like most humans with XY chromosomes—was a fashion emergency. Awkwardly
walking around campus—lost, desperately in need of a haircut, and for some strange reason wearing
glasses so big he looked like an owl hunting for prey. He was just plain
pitiful.
But I have to confess, from the moment
I saw him my heart sang a happy song and I couldn’t look away. Something between
us was magnetic.
Hey, what can I say, I was
always the kind of girl who liked rescue projects. When I was eight
years old, I turned my family’s garage into a makeshift animal shelter, and damn near
gave my father a heart attack when a hungry pack of strays rushed at him
as he pulled into the driveway.
So naturally, one look into Scrooʝe’s sad puppy dog eyes and I felt
right away—he was the one.
Before I knew it, we were college sweethearts
and best friends. Of course, I had to clean him up, but after a few months
under my tutelage everyone noticed his transformation. They saw that with his
gorgeous toffee skin, deliciously full lips and sexy broad shoulders he
was the cutest boy on campus. Pretty
soon I had girls telling me I needed to start a makeover service.
That was how it all started. Who
could have known that a simple makeover would unleash the devilish genius of
the sweetest, shyest, most socially awkward boy I’d ever met, and transform him into
music’s biggest superstar with an ego the size of Texas yet more fragile than an
egg yolk? And a whole lot messier! Not me.
Without a doubt we’ve traveled a long crazy road
together. Scrooʝe was the first boy I gave my heart to. Our relationship went from
me rescuing him in college, to him rescuing me in law school, to our emergence
as music’s power couple. He was the artist/entrepreneur, and I was the best lawyer
love could buy.
And now, we’re strangers.
It’s been three years since we’ve seen or spoken to each other, and
sometimes, against my better judgment, I find myself thinking about him
and feel a smile creep across my face.
This morning was one of those times
when my thoughts turned to Scrooʝe. Normally I’d tell myself off for not letting go, but today I gave
myself a break. After all, it isn’t every day that you might not just run into your
ex, but do it live on television at Hollywood’s biggest event.
“Everything’s gonna be fine, girl,” I
told myself as I contemplated everything that could go wrong if we ran into
each other at The Awards. I was especially dreading an untimely
re-emergence of my long-standing “klutz curse”.
My whole life, I’d been jinxed with “inopportune clumsiness”. As the ring girl at my
parents’ vow renewal, I stumbled, fell in the grass,
and lost the rings. As a tiny ballerina, I was the best in my class, until the
day of the recital when I went tumbling down like Humpty Dumpty.
Now with the whole world watching, I
simply could not afford such an embarrassing spill.
As I sat in the back of a sleek
limousine on my way to the ceremony, gazing up at the L.A. skyline,
nervously checking my hair in the mirror for the dozenth time in half a dozen
minutes, I tried to push down the queasiness threatening to erupt from the
pit of my stomach. The last thing I needed was to step onto the red carpet
covered in this afternoon’s lunch. The paparazzi would surely have a
field day with that one.
Well, like I said it was exactly three
years to the day that I stomped out of Scrooʝe’s life, but tonight we were both
nominated for Awards. I knew God worked in mysterious ways, but now I was
convinced she also had a sense of humor.
I never thought I’d be nominated for anything,
but life had other plans. After we broke up, I quickly discovered that
the best cure for PTRS—post-traumatic-relationship-stress—was writing. By the
time I finished hammering those computer keys, I was author of an
award-winning, best-selling, drama-filled, tragically comic novel that
Hollywood just had to have. Now here I was nominated for an Award as one of the
producers of the year’s biggest movie.
Once word got out that I was
nominated, I was immediately blessed (or cursed depending on your view) with a
merry-go-round of opinions. From my hair to my makeup to my shoes to my dress,
from my eyebrows to my voice, to making sure I didn’t have ashy knees—everyone had an opinion. Normally I was
unflappable, but with so many people giving so many conflicting opinions I was
suddenly a nervous wreck. Finally, I stopped answering the phone because I
couldn’t take any more unsolicited advice. If someone did manage to reach me on
the phone, before they could even say a word I’d say, “No, I don’t know what I’m going to wear, and no, I don’t know how I’m doing my hair,” before abruptly clicking off.
Unbelievable, Russell Simmons can show up without a tie and wearing sneakers,
yet still be a style icon. But let a woman have one eyelash out of place and it’ll be the lead on the evening news.
Two nights before The Awards, I tried
to veg out with an episode of Soccer Moms From Hell. But
before I could lose myself in the drama, my cell phone buzzed with a text. “Oh, come on!” I yelled, throwing my hands up
unnecessarily dramatically. Then I looked at it. It was from my father. He
wrote simply—Be you.
At least there was one man in the
world I could still count on.
Two days later, on my way to The
Awards I tried to wrap my head around the idea that I’d soon be standing on the stage with
millions watching. This was not part of the plan. I was a behind-the-scenes
kind of gal, not at all attracted to the limelight. So, as I pulled up
to The Awards, my nerves fluttered in my stomach like butterflies. But
despite my anxiety, when I last checked the mirror I didn’t look too shabby. Thank God, Michelle
Obama isn’t the only one who looks perfect in a Carolina Herrera gown.
As I climbed out of the limo and
walked the red carpet, waving at the crowd gathered to cheer on their favorite
artists, I thought about everything that had led up to this moment and even
though I was anxious on the inside, on the outside I smiled as if I weren’t the least bit concerned all while
praying for two things—please, don’t let me fall in front of all these
people, and please, please, don’t let me run into Scrooʝe.
About the Author
David Lamb is a native New Yorker, born and raised, bitten with the writing bug since he was in elementary school and had handwriting nobody could decipher. Like Charles Dickens, David grew up a poor boy in the big city who found that the pen really is mightier than the sword. In middle school Lamb’s hero was David Lampel whose velvet voice could be heard reporting the news over David’s grandmother’s radio. Whenever he heard him on the radio, David would substitute Lamb for Lampel and pretend he was delivering the news. Sure that he was destined to be a famous reporter David was happy to go to a high school with a journalism program. Like most kids, by the time he finished high school he had a whole new career in mind. After high school he went to Hunter College and majored in Economics because he wanted to be cool like that college kid who came to speak at his last year of high school. He was an Economics major, he was dressed sharp and above-all the girls thought he was the man! So like any unreasonable high school boy fueled by overactive hormones David figured if he majored in Economics they’d think he was cool. After finishing college David went on to law school at NYU, but all the time writing was still his heart. While working as a lawyer by day, at night he transformed into a writer and eventually wrote and produced the award-winning hit off-Broadway romantic comedy Platanos Y Collard Greens. Being a writer and having the chance make people laugh out loud while challenging them to think about the world around them, and inspire each of us to believe in the power of love and our own ability to overcome life’s challenges is a great gift that David truly enjoys and thanks you for allowing him to share with you in On Top Of The World (Until The Bell Chimes).
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